General-Purpose Stooge Needed
Balls International Industries has an opening available for a stooge. Primary undercover role will be to infiltrate employee cliques and report back to management, but other misc. stooging is expected. The successful candidate will exude shiftiness, excel at backstabbing, and must be a natural liar. Time spent in prison a plus, but not required. Ability to quickly make a shiv from a variety of materials a definite plus. There is significant potential upward mobility from this position! Most of our middle management team here at Balls began their careers as a stooge. Send resume and at least three references to Bleu’s attention.